Well, I am back from blighty (Britain to you non-natives out there) and I had a wonderful time. I still managed to put almost 1000 miles on the hire car…seems to be my lot in life I guess. What I did have though was an amazing weekend with my 4 (count ’em) amazing kids.
Not a single harsh word was needed, they were all amazing well behaved and I thoroughly enjoyed every moment of it. All of the stresses of recent times just evaporated when I got to hold them and spend time with them. The best of it though, was just spending quality time with all of them. I had planned to go bowling, to parks, do this and that and the other….it was going to be a full and packed weekend. When I saw them though, I realised that I didn’t need any of those distractions.
We were out and about, visiting my brothers and sister in law with my amazing nephew Josh. I have since been told that he is like it with most blokes, but I made an instant connection to Josh and he would cry whenever I left. Quite nice really as I am inherently bad with other peoples kids, if they are related to me or not, but Josh was different..such a placid and nicely mannered boy for his age. I got to see him walk, which he has only just started doing…which was cool :-)
I resolutely refused to allow Ellen to be “Little Mum” like she always used to end up being whenever she has visited me in the past. I looked after all of the kids, properly, and enjoyed every minute of it. I think they enjoyed it too. Don’t get me wrong, I know Ellen loves to mother people and be involved, but she is a kid too and deserves to be spoilt like the others. I treated them all to some useful sports stuff for school/after school activities, rather than trinkets that they won’t use in a week. We played, we laughed, we cuddled up and watched a movie, went to the park, went for a walk, played rugby in the garden. We just generally had fun together and for my part I got to reconnect with my children and loved every moment.
It is a strange life as an estranged father, but I intend to make the most of it whenever I can. I absolutely refused to fall into my past routine of spending time on the computer and leaving the kids to their own devices. I think I was on Facebook for a total of about 20 minutes, and I checked my email about 3 times…and I didn’t get the shakes – go me :-) . I made sure that we only visited my family a few minutes away from where we were, as I didn’t want to waste time travelling and then be distracted by spending time with friends and not the kids. We were all up at the crack of sparrows and went to bed quite late each day (not too late though ;-) )
None of the kids wanted to go home, and I agreed as it was far too short of a visit…something I will rectify for next time definitely. Obviously I have to work around their holidays now to make sure I can have a week or two with them next time, but do that I will. Tears were shed by everyone, but I know with complete certainty that they all genuinely love me and miss me, and I hope they know that I miss them all so much it is heartbreaking for me.
I did have to put up with some shocking music in the car, some eurodancetrashpopdrumbasehouse nonsense that they seem to like. However, they are my kids afterall….which meant by the end of the weekend, they were all asking for The Wombats, Maximo Park and Dragonforce to be played so that they could all air guitar and air drum their way to wherever we were going. Hey! Kids need decent music too you know….and at least mine have taste….even if it is ruined by technogarageshed garbage from time to time.
Normal posting will resume shortly, I just wanted to share the best weekend I have had in a bloody long time :-)