A snail thats slow
A snail slowly slithers into a bar, slithers slowly up to the counter and says, "excuse me, can i have a pint of bitter please?"
The barman looks around, but can't see anyone in his bar, so sits back down again.
"excuse me" says the snail "can i have a pint of bitter please?"
again the barman stands up, and again he sees no one, so he sits back down, thinking it's his imagination.
"OI!" says the snail "can i have a pint of bitter please?"
The barman finally looks down and there he sees the snail. "JESUS CHRIST!" exclaims the barman "PISS OFF YOU LITTLE SLIMY BASTARD! I DON'T SERVE NO BLOODY SNAILS IN MY BAR!!!" fuming with rage, the barman jumps over the bar, grabs the snail, takes it outside and throws it as far as he can.
5 years pass, and the barman is again sitting behind his bar, when he hears a voice say, "so...am i barred then?"