Moving To The Country?
DEAR DIARY
AUG 12
Moved to out new home in Massachusetts. It is so beautiful here. The mountains are so majestic. Can hardly wait to see snow covering them.
OCT 14
Massachusetts is the most beautiful place on earth. The leaves are turning all the colors and shades of red and orange. Went for a ride through the beautiful mountains and saw some deer. They are so graceful. Certainly they are th most wonderful animal on earth. This must be paradise. I love it here.
NOV 11
Deer season will start soon. I can't imagine anyone wanting to kill such a gorgeous creature. Hope it will snow soon. I love it here.
DEC 2
It snowed last night. Woke up to find everything blanketed with white. It looks like a postcard. We went outside and cleaned the snow off the steps and shoveled the driveway. We had a snowball fight (I won), and when the snowplow came by, we had to shovel the driveway again. What a beautiful place. I love Massachusetts.
DEC 12
More snow last night. I love it. The snowplow did his trick again to the driveway. I love it here.
DEC 19
More snow last night. Couldn't get out of the driveway to get to work. I am exhausted from shoveling. Damn snowplow!
DEC 22
More of that white shit fell last night. I've got blisters on my hands from shoveling. I think the snowplow hides around the curve and waits until i'm done shoveling the driveway. Asshole!
DEC 25
Merry Fucking Christmas! More friggen snow. If I ever get my hands on that son-of-a-bitch who drives the snowplow I swear I'll kill the bastard. Don't know why they don't use more salt on the roads to melt the fucking ice.
DEC 27
More white shit last night. Been inside for three days, except for shoveling out the driveway after that snowplow goes through every time. Can't go anywhere, car is stuck in a mountain of white shit. The weatherman says to expect another 10" of the shit again tonight. Do you know how many shovels full of snow 10" is????
DEC 28
The fucking weatherman was wrong. We got 34" of that white shit this time. At this rate it won't melt before this summer. The snowplow got stuck up in the road and that bastard came to the door and asked to borrow my shovel. After I told him I had broken six shovels already shoveling all the shit he pushed into the driveway, I broke my last one over his fucking head.
JAN 4
Finally got out of the house today. Went to the store to get food and on the way back a damned deer ran in front of the car and I hit it. Did about $3000 damage to the car. Those fucking beasts should be killed. Wish the hunters had killed them all last November.
MAY 3
Took the car to the garage in Town. Would you believe the thing is rusting out from that fucking salt they put all over the roads.
MAY 10
Moved to Georgia. I can't imagine why anyone in their right mind would ever live in that God-forsaken Commenwealth of Massachusetts.