Breaking the space/time continuum

1.21 GigawattsOk, try not to panic everyone, but I may be causing a catastrophic space/time event that could do untold damage to this ball of chemicals we lovingly call Earth.

Let me explain.   I watch TV shows…a lot of TV shows.   Now other people say that they watch a lot of shows and really…they don’t.   To give you an indication, I am watching (in no particular order):

American Dad, Family Guy, My Name is Earl, Bones, Ghost Whisperer, Heroes, Supernatural, Prison Break, CSI, CSI Miami, CSI New York, Flashpoint, Smallville, Chuck, Californication, Dexter.

And these are just the shows that are airing at the moment, on top of this I watch every Liverpool match, some films, listen to music, write this blog, am active on Facebook and a number of forums, design websites, call my kids, chat with friends and have a bloody active social life.   I hold a full time job, go wandering aimlessly around Frankfurt and I do actually sleep from time to time.   Oh, and I occasionally double as a failure at helping people hang lights and move home.

I am genuinely concerned.   I went to bed at 10pm last night.   Yet..I had managed to leave work late, walk home instead of using public transport, make dinner, chat to friends, and watch a number of shows.   It is entirely possible that I have found a way to bend space and time, I can only apologise for when the world inevitable blows up from my abuse of this new found power.   At some point I am bound to require a white haired professor who is guaranteed to require one point twenty one gigawatts of power for something extraordinary.   That reminds me, I must remember to get a picture of myself and key family members to keep in my wallet.

I should probably aim to use this new found ability, to make time my bitch, for good though.   Hopefully not in a comic relief Hiro from Heroes kind of way though, and I would probably end up creating a series of nefarious schemes that would help me get a) Money and b) Laid (not necessarily in that order).   Although, I could go back in time and stop my past self from over-eating…that could work.   I just have to be careful not to step on any butterflies apparently.

Unfortunately, I don’t get to use the “not enough time in the day” excuse at the moment.   I am probably stealing yours :-P

1 thought on “Breaking the space/time continuum

  1. All that is simply because you lack a female presense to serve as the black hole for your space-time continuum ;)

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